Bing Crosby season has come upon us. I call the few days before Christmas "Bing Crosby Season" because I believe Bing Crosby to be the uncontested king of Christmas ditties. Bing Crosby season is the time for resolutions and personal improvement. You could say that New Years Resolutions are supposed to do that, too, but I believe what better time to get sh-t done than right before the turn of the new year, when everything is winding down and everyone is relaxing and you finally have time to do things? So here are my Bing Crosby season resolutions.
Resolution #1: Blog more. I have 0 readers, and I've just changed my url to something more me so any leftover stalkers won't know where to find me, and I can turn over a new leaf. My life is pretty gd remarkable and it deserves to be immortalized in ways that everyone can do these days. Besides, no one knows who the mysterious "Jasmine Tea" is....
Resolution #2: Stop worrying about my weight and just go with it. I'm pretty chunky right now and I'm pretty sure that's contributing to the fact that no one wants to be around me. People may say that they're openminded but they're really just pieces of crap.
Resolution #3: Stop allowing people to be mean to me. I'm tired of people patronizing me because they think they know better than I how to go about life. I am the most logical, manipulative, and life-savvy person I know....duhr.
Resolution #4: Make more friends at USC. A semester has already gone by and I'm still pretty much friendless. I mean, I'm good friends with my roommate, but roommate is roommate, that's on a plane higher than "friend." I have de facto best friends like LD and SC, but they're on higher planes, too, because I was bffs with them even before I went to USC. I NEED AMIGOS.
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