"The Authentic Team America"

Tseng老师：啊，我們現在有比賽，好嗎？
大家：CLAMMER CLAMMER CLAMMER.
Tseng老師（denoting teams):你三個，你三個，你三個，你三個。
白女：我們是“Team America"
中國美國男：No,我们是“Team America"
白女：Yeah, but we're the authentic Team America *waves around at the three 白人 that make up her team. Er, 我們是地道的Team America.

[English Translation]

Prof. Tseng: How about we have a competition now?
Everyone: YAAAAAAAA. (except Me: "mrrrrrrrr don't like competitions")
Prof. Tseng: Ok, you three, you three, you three, you three.
White girl: We're "Team America."
Chinese-American guy: No, we're Team America.
White girl: *motions at her white teammates* Yeah, but we're the authentic Team America.

This happened last Wednesday, in my Mandarin Chinese III class. I had had a rather boring, borderline bad day since my Terrorism class has become the bane of my existence, so when Prof. Tseng said we were going to have a competition, I was def. less than stoked (I hate competitions).

First, an explanation of "Team America." In Tseng Laoshi's Mandarin Reading & Writing class of the Spring 2010 semester, all the students were from Hong Kong, in there for an easy A, while only three others were ABC. So whenever these three ABC would sit together, they would joke that they were "Team America." This term was imported into my Mandarin III class by one member of that "Team America" to denote whichever team he was on, and subsequently came to mean whichever team was "best." How do I know this? Because another member of that "Team America" is my roommate.

So when this white girl says, "We're the authentic Team America," because they're all white, I got a major tummy ache and my blood pressure went up. This stupid freshman, what is she talking about?! I glared at her for a few seconds, but she didn't notice because, and no one else noticed what she had said, not even Tseng Laoshi. If she had said something like that in a professional work place setting, she could have charges brought up against her. I kind of wish I could do that now.

This kind of thinking, that Chinese Americans, or Asian Pacific Americans, can never be truly American, is something that I seriously, rabidly campaign against. I kind of wish I could have called her openly on what she had just said.

Melanin.



Actually I would never do that because I'm not actually that racist. Sheesh. But apparently she is.